Nearly three months ago, I sat down and began to think about
how I wanted to focus my attentions and actions this year. I read a blog post recommended by a friend,
and decided that I liked the idea of choosing words of intention rather than
making resolutions for the year. Each
August, I purchase a piece of jewelry from K. Robbins, and that sets my focus
for the next twelve months, so I knew instantly what my first word would
be.
That seems to me, a self explanatory word. Who doesn’t want more joy in their life? And putting that thought forward and moving
your directions in that action can only bring good things, right? Thinking about the others took a bit more
time, but I came up with them during the first week of the year. The next word?
Self.
Sort of as in selfish. . .but in a good way. Too often I put myself out for others, and
forget to feed Tanya. Without giving to
myself, how can I feel full and complete joy?
I knew that I needed to focus on myself mentally, spiritually,
physically, and artistically. Time was
being spent on others, but not so much on me.
Gifts were being shared with others, but I wasn’t doing enough to honor
myself. Two thousand and twelve would be
that year. I had chosen two of my words.
But what about the third? I auditioned many, and kept coming back to “finish”. I rolled that around for awhile, liking many
of the ideas that came to mind, but felt it was a bit limiting. . .finish
what? Finish how? What do I do when I am finished? Was there another way to say, “get it done”
without being so final?
Complete.
I liked it.
Done. Whole. Applicable to so many arenas of my life. That was it.
My third word.
I planned this blog post in my head a hundred times. I worked on these goals. Focused my actions. I ignored the blog. Not because I didn’t want to write, but because
I didn’t have time.
We thought by asking a family member to live with us, we’d
have joy in our lives, we’d feel complete.
Instead, we had frustrations and a tenant that stayed for a short time,
but took up nearly two months of our energy.
Work spiraled from being busy and challenging to being out
of control and demanding.
I was sick.
Our sick cat got sicker.
Deadlines for publication pushed me to knit more than I
should, and there was an overuse injury.
Basically life happened.
We all have periods of our lives where we cannot imagine how we have
muscled through and completed all that we have.
I think the last three months have been that for me. I look at the calendar, and cannot believe
that I’ll be turning the page to April in a couple of days. The year 2012 is one fourth complete. Complete.
Joy. Self. Complete.
I have found myself emptying my plate for the last couple of
weeks. Removing responsibilities, and
making room for Joy. Making room for
Self. Striving to feel Complete.
There have been lessons learned, for sure. And I still believe that my three words are
the right ones. It’s time to see what
the second quarter will bring in terms of how I will grow, and who I will
become. It hasn't been a bad beginning to the year, just one more challenging than I ever would have suspected when the clock struck midnight on December 31.
I have been knitting more lately, and reading for pleasure. I am feeling more myself. I suspect I’ll be writing more too—so for the
few of you who check in here wondering when I’ll post again, it may be sooner
than later.
I leave home in a few hours for a much needed break, and
hope to have a lot of things to share with those who pop in to see how I’m
doing. I suspect there will be plenty of
joy in the next week, and I’ll come home feeling a bit more complete. I’ll be taking care of self.
I hope that this first bit of 2012 has been treating you
well, and that your resolutions are not long forgotten. I’d love to know what you’ve been up to.
Peace